Sunday, March 12, 2006

My Peaches and Herb Story.

So, there I was auditioning for a wedding band. As a rule, I loathed the idea of playing in a wedding band. I wanted to rock out on stage and at these functions you had to play crap like Daddy's Little Girl and similar middle of the road songs. You could play a few rock and roll numbers for the younger audience members, but your band had to appeal to everyone at the wedding reception. The father of the bride was more than likely footing the bill for his darling daughter's special day, so a lot of musical compromising was in order.

It was for that reason I swore on a stack of bibles I would never play in a wedding band and sacrifice my rock'n'roll heritage for a few dollars. But,when I learned that wedding bands could rake in some nice cash, suddenly playing lame songs in a formal setting didn't seem like such a bad deal. And sometimes they fed you. Another plus.

So it was for this reason I found myself,along with other hopefuls, trying out for one of the most popular wedding bands in the area called The Dream People. They enjoyed a reputation as being a polished and professional group who always wore matching powder blue tuxedos during a gig. Sure, the music was lame and the thought of having to wear a powder blue tux was enough to induce vomiting, but the money was the main inducement for the long line of musicians at this audition.

As I waited my turn, another guitar player and myself struck up a conversation. He told me, " You know, I once played with Peaches and Herb." (For those who don't remember, Peaches and Herb's biggest hit was a song called Reunited) I thought to myself," Pack up your guitar and go home, Joe. This guy's got the audition in the bag. He's a professional and you're not."

Well, when he got up to play, this guy didn't show anybody anything. I was as good as he was.If he did play with Peaches and Herb it must have been in his dreams. After he left, another guitar player who overheard our conversation said to me," I think what he meant to say was he packed peaches and smoked herb."


Anonymous Anonymous said...

The O. Henry ending to this one is hilarious!

11:06 PM  

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