Sunday, August 26, 2018

The Animal Crackers Box Gets A Makeover Courtesy Of PETA.

When I attended Catholic Parochial School as a wee lad, our class would  perform our annual Christmas Show for Monsignor Sweeny. While us kids sang and danced our little hearts out, the good Monsignor,being a rather elderly man, would promptly fall asleep. Instead of being offended, I and my my fellow classmates felt that because he was so old, the poor fellow really needed a nap. I mean, it wasn't like he was an important Broadway producer bored into a state of narcolepsy by dreadful, amateur performers. Now that would have been ego crushing. Especially to a group of  impressionable eleven year old kids.

Afterwards, when he awoke, Monsignor Sweeny always gave each of us a box of Animal Crackers. I would take my bountiful box of animal shaped treats home with me after school to enjoy along with a cold glass of milk. The artwork on the box conjured memories of going to the circus and seeing the various animals presented to the public. The sights of exotic animals, the smell of hay. Ah, childhood memories!

But now, PETA, those self appointed,self anointed Guardians of The Animal Kingdom , have seen fit to tear away at my childhood memories. They complained ,en mass, to Nabisco that they were offended by the art cover on the box of animals in cages and demanded,( that's right, demanded) the cookie company change the picture on the box to animals roaming free in the wild.

Say what? You mean to tell me that with all of the problems going on in the world at the moment, PETA, that band of intolerant animal huggers, people who surely must have other more important things to do with their time, got themselves all amped up by a drawing depicting animals in cages to the point where they beefed, bitched and vehemently protested that Nabisco change the offending art cover? The worst part is that Nabisco caved in and acquiesced to this band of Bozo's over the top, ridiculous demands.

I've never been a fan of PETA. It's bad enough the rest of us have to listen to these self-righteous whack jobs tell us not to eat animals and not to wear fur made from animals. It's equally aggravating when I read where several of their members went to where a group of fishermen had cast their lines in the water and from the other side of the river began throwing rocks in the water to scare away the fish.  You see, I don't like to be told what to do. By anyone! PETA's in-your-face, bullying tactics have no affect on me or my life. They should live their lives as they please and leave the rest of us the hell alone.

You wanna be a Vegan, knock yourself out. You wanna wear clothes made out of polyester and other man made materials, that's okay by me. You wanna feel some sort of self-validation by making the world safe for the animals, then party hearty  Me? I'll continue eating steak, fish and chicken. I'll proudly wear my leather coat and my fur fedora hat. And if that smug bullying group of animal huggers has a problem with that, they can fold it three ways and stick it where the sun don't shine.

I used to have a Facebook friend named Bobbi Jo  who is a staunch animal rights activist. She is a proud, card carrying Vegan and belongs to several animal rights groups. I made  joke one time about having meat for dinner. Mind you, it was a joke. Instead of letting me know that I had offended her, Bobbi Jo abruptly unfriended me. If she had, like a real friend, said my remark had offended her, I would have immediately apologized. This is called " Having a dialog". I consider her to be cowardly and I don't like or respect cowards.

To be honest, I was under the impression the this woman loved animals a hell of a lot more than she did people. Once on her time line, Bobbi Jo stated that anybody who made what she considered an anti-animal remark would be immediately unfriended. To paraphrase her remark," Animals are our future." Um, okay Bobbi Jo. So much for tolerance.

During the time  when we were getting along like two peas in a pod, Bobbi Jo  once confided in me that she and her husband were separated and possibly headed for divorce court. Why she chose to divulge such personal information to me was a mystery. In any event, with an attitude like hers, no wonder her marriage was in the shitter. No spouse,or human being for that matter, wants to take a back seat. Especially to a member of the animal kingdom.

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